"Work and love; love and work... that's all there is." - Freud

I think Freud was right when he said "Work and love; love and work... that's all there is." People obsess about sex, money and power, but none of those come close to either being occupied in fulfilling work or in the love of others - because those three things are all means to an ends, whereas fulfilling work and love are processes which are their own ends.

I was born

I was born with the umbilical chord wrapped around my neck. If I had died when I was born then I wouldn't have had this fucking amazing weird, terrifying, exhilarating, frustrating, educational, unspeakable, paradoxical life. So I am grateful to be alive. Thank you.

Confirmation Bias

Idiots can convince themselves that they are extremely smart and well informed by reading erudite people who agree with their already existing views.

Helping

The best forms of therapy, in my opinion, are the ones where the clients are enabled to have most of the revelations themselves, rather than deferring to the insight of the practitioner for "wow"ing.

Passive or Aggressive

I know everyone is dysfunctional but I rather begin friendships with people who are the more passive kind that aggressive kind, because I can help them become more assertive, brave and honest, and they see can easily see the benefits.  People who are at the other polarity are less likely to change in my experience because using the hammer seems to "get things done" - they often get what they want from being aggreessive, it's harder to see what they are missing out on, what they are destroying in the process of being aggressive.

Gender Issues

I Interview Robbyn Peters Bennett of www.stopspanking.org

Perspective on "Tough Justice"

People become violent as a result of suffering severe trauma, such as childhood neglect, abandonment or abuse (physical, emotional and/or sexual) --- that is the conclusion of established social science based on the psychological data available to us. 

The latest science on nature versus nurture says that human nature is 70-80% adaptation to environment, particularly early childhood experiences. The idea that "tough justice" ie. inflicting more trauma on an already traumatised/abused individual, will make them better rather than worse, is the result of a primitive kind of thinking, ie. if you do something unpleasant to me then I will do something unpleasant back to you to teach you a lesson. The psychology shows clearly that It Does Not teach them a lesson, it makes them worse because they are now humiliated and want to get revenge. Since the trace of trauma can be tracked in the brain, Brain Scans Of Criminals Can Predict Recidivism (returning to prison.) If we want to rehabilitate criminals we have to understand trauma and learn how to reverse it.

The reason why people continue to believe in "tough justice" even though all the data shows it is a wrong-minded approach to deterring violence, is usually because they were treated punitively as children, exposed to punishments, spanking, "strict-discipline" and told it was "for their own good" - and so looking at the situation clearly for what it is would also ential having to reassess their own childhood for trauma and wounds inflicted on them advertently or inadvertently by their own care-givers. That can obviously be a very painful process for most people.

Harsh corporal punishment produces a dogmatic personality, meaning an inability to adapt and change opinions in light of new information. Evidence shows that people who receive corporal punishment are more likely to support punitive public policies such as the death sentence. These views are psychologically motivated, they are not based on reason and evidence, but avoidance of the suffering entailed in bringing childhood wounds into the conscious awareness so they can be dealt with, the benefit of doing so is being given the opportunity to overcome them, and go from seeing the world through irrational biases to seeing it as it really is.

When prisons were originally introduced as the weapon of choice in the fight against crime we did not know much about how to halt the cycle of prisoners reoffending. Now there are several methods which have shown to be effective. The recent science of rehabilitation shows that criminals who are able to study and attain a masters degree in prison are ecxeedingly unlikely to reoffend. Also, recidivism can be reduced by teaching Transindental Meditation to prisoners, as does teaching prisoners Nonviolent Communication - which stands to reason as in many instances violence is the only way that people who have not been taught to negotiate with others know to get what they want. One study conducted in a Nevada Prison showed that a technological process that appears to help the brain reverse the effects of trauma, Brainwave Optimisation, can rehabilitate violent criminals.

With enough will we can understand and end violence for good.

I Interview Pete Gerlach

alien ambassador

In my dream I was an ambassador from an alien species. I landed near a school which was almost empty apart from a couple of adults whom I seemed to think were part of the government. I kept referring to each of them respectfully as the 'minister for -' ... 'is the minister for education such-and-such?' whatever I assumed their position was. Some guy kept taking me around the corridors, I wanted to see the right people and speak to them but he kept prevaricating by doing that. Inhabiting this character was interesting because he was very benevolent, I could tell that on his planet the government was really there to do for people, they really cared. He probably would have been very upset if he ever found out what it was like on earth. It was interesting feel that way or that that was even possible from as an anarchist.

I Interview Stefan Molyneux

What Do You Do With Your Doubts? (WIP)

Well I find my mind is blinded by such simple situations, 

and my constant cogitations lead me lost into frustration, 

Though I can't make head or tail of it, nor hammer from the nail of it, 

It seems I'm bound to fail of it: Uncertainty prevails.
 
I have heard each word you've said and I can sense your agitation
That your constant confoundation gives you cause for aggravation,
Perhaps I've a solution that may bring you restitution,
That may make a resolution of your mental destitution,
 
It seems to me, you verily, 

Could live your life most happily, 

If only you'd embrace the key to overcome uncertainty...

Well?

What do you do with your doubts?

Throw them out! Throw them out!

Tell me what do you do with your doubts?

Throw them out! Throw them out! 

When you're not quite sure how to feel,

And you can't quite tell night from day,
The grass could be greener, 

Your conscience could be cleaner,
And you still don't kow what to say.....

Well!

What do you do with your doubts?

Throw them out! Throw them out!

Tell me what do you do with your doubts?

Throw them out! Throw them out! 

Though I note your proposition to improve my disposition, 

Yet I fear that my condition begs a more complex prescription,


More to come....

Baloney

A harrowed businessman once came into his therapists’ office after being bothered again and again by a reoccurring dream. Even although he’d been under analysis for a couple of months he couldn’t really tell you that he’d fully engaged with the treatment if he was to be honest. Deep down he was convinced that even seeing a shrink was a load of old baloney that couldn’t really help him with any matters pertaining to the real world, but it was a good opportunity to vent his spleen to someone who would have to listen and give his undivided attention, because he was being paid to. Meanwhile his life was crashing in around him, and getting progressively worse, which only went to prove that psychoanalysis was dated nonsense believed only by socialist professors in ivory towers who had never even seen the reality of the rat race first hand.

“You think I got problems, Doc? Let me tell you, even my ulcers got ulcers! My business is about to hit the rocks, my wife has insisted on separation and won’t even take my calls! Soon I’ll be getting the divorce papers through, heck that’s all I need! If I can’t get the cash together, and soon, I’m going to have to declare bankruptcy and lose the house to boot! I swear to god I’ll end up in hospital with another bypass. ‘Course I got problems. What do you expect me to do?”

This dream, however… he found it so irksome to be bothered by it night after night that he found himself turning up with a new willingness to do just about whatever his Freudian friend might ask of him. The hell with it, he didn’t have that much further to fall after all.

“I’m interested in knowing how often you’ve been having this dream? Or variations on the same dream?”

“It’s the same dream Doc! And I have it every night! Almost every night without fail! The only night I think I didn’t have it was when I was staying over at my mistress’ place. Does that mean anything?”

“Hm, I don’t know. How is your relationship with your girlfriend these days? Better than with your wife I assume?” he added with a sardonic smile befitting an analyst.

“I dunno to be honest. I just don’t think I excite her the way I used to, if you know what I mean. It’s ok I guess. Just no real verve.”

“I see, and is there anything else going on? It seems there’s a little something else playing on your mind, maybe you could let me in on the full story.”

“What, are you a mind reader? Ok, I just keep on thinking about how unfair all this is on my son. He’s only 8 years old and he deserves a good father. With a good strong marriage, and a good strong business to go into. Or at least sell it if he likes. I want to be able to give him an education, you know? Everything I went without. He’s the innocent victim here that’s what really gets to me.”

“I understand. You feel bad for yourself, but you can handle that because so far as you see it you’re the one who made the mess. Same goes for your wife, she’s an adult woman after all. It’s your son you feel worried about because he didn’t have any hand in creating these problems. Right?”

“Yeah! Right! Exactly! You know what Doc? You ain’t too bad! What about my dream though?”

“I’m just coming to that. Let’s go over it again. You keep seeing these little symbols, almost like items in a computer game. One is a small pot of gold. One two short pieces of string. Then there are two hands, one thumb up, the other thumb down. There is also a broken walking stick with a snake for a head, an old, discarded baseball bat and ball, and an olive branch with only one olive and three leaves on it. Is that right?”

“You got it Doc! Can’t make heads or tails of it neither. What do you say?”

“Now look, usually I’d interpret the dream for you, but I want to take a different approach, let me know what you think…”

“So you ain’t gonna make sense of it at all?”

“I think this will be much more effective.”

“Lay it on me.”

“I’m going to write you a doctor’s note and I want you to cut your work hours down to a minimum this week. Especially Monday through Wednesday. Only take absolutely essential calls. Delegate everything else to your secretary, get another one if you have to. I want you to spend time at home, and I want you to spend as much as you can doing the following exercises, here write this down.” The doctor scrambled to hand him a pen and notepad.

“Monday: I want you to visualise at least three big pots of gold, spend as much of the day as you can recreating the dream in your head but this time with these great big pots of gold instead of the tiny one you originally saw.

Tuesday: I want you to keep seeing the dream as much as you can, all day, but replace the two short bits of string with a big long braid that stretches on into the distance. If you see gold also, make sure it’s still great big pots and not the small one you saw at first, and I want you to continue in this fashion.

On Wednesday, I want you to see two hands shaking.

On Thursday I want you to see  that walking stick good as new, in fact turn it into some fancy diamond-encrusted sceptre if you want, go nuts.

On Friday I’d like you to picture a full-sized baseball field, with lots of enthusiastic people playing on it and having a great time.

Finally on Saturday, spend the day visualising a great big thriving olive tree. Then on Sunday you can come back in and tell me how you got on.”

“Doc, you gotta be kidding me! I need your help here! Can’t you see my life is falling apart? How is cutting work to think of cute pictures gonna solve me any problems? I gotta work hard at this. Cut me some slack! All I want to know is what this crazy dream is all about, and you want me to sit back and do nothing but think of cartoons?”

“Listen, this is serious work, I want you to give it a real shot. Don’t deny yourself any important leisure activities, but spend as much time as possible doing as I’ve asked you. If you try this out and it doesn’t work then next week we can take a more active approach. But I want you to give it your everything. Agreed?”

“Alright I’ll give it a shot, but I got to tell you, I’m pretty sceptical.”

“Put your scepticism aside for me, just for this week. I want you to engage with the process fully. Don’t let either of us down now.”

“Alright, alright already! Jeez you sound just like my mother. I’ll see you next week, ma.”

“See you next week.”

And with that the business man left.

A week later he returned to therapy, visibly glowing. He looked five if not ten years younger and there was a slight spring in his step as he entered the office.

“Doc, I don't know what you've done or how you’ve done it but I really gotta hand it to ya, things are changing in my life big time! I did what you said and didn’t go into the office until Thursday, just worked from home, then I got the important phone call and I'm just about to sign this great deal with another company. This could really save my ass! I spoke to my wife on Wednesday night and she’s called off the divorce, we're actually speaking to each other properly for the first time in years and she wants to work things out. I was even going to lose my mistress, but I took her out Friday night and the sex was so incredible I didn't have the heart to break it off in the morning. I checked my blood pressure today and it’s all back in the green zone. But best of all, you gotta hear this! Yesterday, instead of going out to playing golf with my buddies, I played my son at baseball. I was inspired by the big pitch that cropped up in my dream. Like in the movie, huh? ‘If you build it they will come’? Did I mention that? That everything in the dream changed around like you said? Well, the boy and I, we had an amazing heart to heart and I got to be completely honest with him about everything that’s been going on, and my feelings and all that crap, y’know? He’s such a bright kid, he understood everything I said and let me know how he was feeling about everything too, I could hardly believe he’s only eight! Well I feel like we’re best friends now, not just family, what’s family huh? Having sex with each other was just about the last good turn my parents ever done me. So anyway, enough already, I came home and did your visualisations all evening until I fell asleep and I woke up this morning feeling great. There’s only one thing that’s still driving me crazy. What did all that stuff in the dream mean, and why all these pictures? You gotta tell me what you done Doc, you gotta tell me what it all means?”

The analyst took the liberty of a long pause to stroke his beard.

“Well…” he laboured, “To be honest I didn’t really do any of the work. You interpreted the dream for me yourself. You see, the tiny pot of gold represented your attitude towards money. You just couldn’t ever see there being enough of it. So I got you to imagine an abundance of gold. Then you saw two separate pieces of string, and I figured it matched your whole outlook on your marriage. So I simply got you to braid them together into a long enduring tie that stretched out into the future with three strands: one for you, one for your wife, and one for your son. Next you told me how worried you were about your business: you saw one thumb up and one thumb down. You couldn’t see your clients agreeing on deals, so I got you to replace the picture with a handshake to make closing deal possible in your minds eye. Then there was the broken stick. I don’t think we need to say anything about this broken stick, Freud would have a field day. The really rather pathetic olive branch in your dream represented your health, so I got you to replace it with a vibrant tree, and finally that left the old, discarded baseball bat and ball. You wanted to invest more in your relationship with your son, so I got you to visualise a whole baseball field complete with a spirited game in progress. So, my fine analysand. What do you think?”

“Doc,” the client responded with a sardonic smile befitting an analysand, “What a load of old baloney! I think you oughtta see a shrink!”

With that he left the office and the therapist never heard from him again.

(c) Antony Sammeroff,  21/07/12

She took me out of the city and lay me down with her next to the shrubs close to a ravine in what I could only imagine was a deer skin. She made it clear with her reactions that I was not to speak, and nor did she, but very soon we began to communicate with one another in images and all was understood between us, even without words.

She taught me the language of the forest.

The ground spoke to me of ancient times when they were covered in snow, but they were happier then because the soil was alive and the ravens still sung. I learned of ancient healers and medicine men who used to walk the lands when they were brown in Autumn.

The next night we were closer, as she naked next to me my hands felt invited to explore her body, whch was pleasing to her and wonderful to me. When I reached her sex with my fingers it was warm and moist but I knew there was fear in my heart over whether we should make love and when I touched her clitoris she reacted negatively after a moment, but perhaps only as a consequence of my trepidation. I know we slept together but did not make love.

An Awesome Game conceived of in a most Interesting Dream

I had a dream last night that I was participating in a game. I guess you could say it was a role playing game. The game can take place in any area big enough, in my case it was a few buildings based on some of those of at my old high school and others created entirely by my unconscious like a castle tower. At a stretch you could maybe run it in a flat or house with several rooms, or you could expand it to a whole university campus or something like that if you were brave enough, didn't mind the walking, and wanted to make it a really big game. Naturally in these cases there will be all sorts of people who are "not playing" scattered through the game world, going about their business and most probably absolutely oblivious to what is going on with those participating. That helps add to the atmosphere. The game had a made up name which sounded Spanish, which I guess means the playing area represented the whole of Spain.

The premise of the game is that you and one other player are long lost brothers and need to search the game world for clues as to how to find the other, each of you follows the "treasure hunt" in the reverse order from one another and it's actually sort of a race or competition to see who gets most fastest and figures it out first, at which the time you both succeed when you meet. The clues are generally dispensed by other characters in the game in various locations, although the actions of characters and choices they make throughout the game may affect things such as where these characters will be found, whether they move to other locations or not, and their willingness to help one or each of these two players. 

The default location, order and nature of the clues, as well as the dispositions of those who deliver them, are randomised from game to game by means which were not explained by the dream. N.B. Only one game took place throughout the entire dream and it took hours to play!

The two "main characters" may bump into one another throughout the course of play - but the rub is it if their characters aren't aware that the other is their macguffin "in game" - it doesn't count at all! They may even interact with one another obliviously! (Although in my case we only passed in corridors.) This is supposed to add to the humour an quirkiness of the concept as well as the challenge. 

Towards the end of the dream when it was reaching a climax I remember getting very angry at the other player for watching which direction I went off in after we passed, which I claimed to be "cheating."


When I was explaining what happened in the dream to Suzy I suddenly went "fuck... I know what the dream was about..." ... "It's actually about finding myself, isn't it?"

Stuart Wilde speaks of a mirror world in which the inner you, associated with your feelings, resides. He claims that this in not a figure of speach or a metaphor as he and thousands of others have looked through into this mirror world and seen their authentic selves. This is the imprint of you which supposedly allows you to survive your death and transcend into whatever it is that comes next.

If my interpretation is right and that's what the "long lost brother" in the game represents then the people milling around who "weren't playing" represent those who have no interest in, or don't believe in spirituality. Those who dispensed clues? I don't know, guides or something?... And perhaps at the end, where the other player (whom I recognised as we both set off from one another at the beginning of the game but didn't really seem to know well in person) was watching where I went, it was perhaps because he already knew "in game" that I was who he was looking for, he'd beat me to the punch, but didn't say. In fact I don't remember him saying much if anything...

Thomas Hobbes

Thomas Hobbes was a man who was very afraid of himself and what he feared he would become without his conscience, I think he saw the state (or monarch) as ones conscience, thats why he supported monarchy, but also because he was so traumatised by the civil war in Britain during his life time that he thought that monarchy was the only way to prevent such catastophes, but actually forcing order at the point of a gun (or blade in those days) is setting up those catastrophes to happen, people need to learn how to order themselves by mutual experience!


See Also:  https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=2209141169396522058#editor/target=post;postID=7932282800129651091;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=66;src=postname